Together We Are an Ocean: Not Easily Broken

Individually we are one drop, together, we are an ocean

~ Ryunosuke Satoro

A Mother's Courage: The Mary Thomas Story, stars Alfre Woodard as the mother of NBA ball player Isiah Thomas, and gives an inside look at the early life of the former Detroit Piston, but also shares the remarkable story of his mother, whose courage and determination is highlighted throughout the movie as she raises her children as a single parent in a neighborhood thriving with gangs and gang activity.

One of the scenes takes place in the family's home, as Mary Thomas calls all of her children to gather around the dining room table. She had just argued with their oldest brother and he walked out of the house, to go back into the streets to live. As the children, including a young Isiah Thomas, collected themselves at the table she handed each one of them a single matchstick, and then asked each of them to break it in half. 

Not knowing why she would ask them to do such a silly thing, each child did as they were told and broke the stick in half with ease. Then Mary Thomas took ten matches from the box and held them together in her hand, and no matter how hard she tried, she simply could not break all the matches at the same time. She then proceeded to teach her childen the valuable lesson about standing together as one.

This lesson also brings to mind one of my favorite scriptures from the bible, Ecclesiastes 4:12. Even though one of us alone can be overpowered, two of us together can defend ourselves better. "A cord of three strands is no easily broken".

This concept was even the basis for the movie titled Not Easily Broken, which focuses on the ideal that marriage is not just a union of two souls but the divine connection of the husband, wife and their God.

Keep on learning, loving, and living people. And if you find yourself alone, remember your God is always with you and He has something in store for you so great, it's well worth the wait. This journey was not meant to be travelled alone.

"I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings. My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love."

~ Mahatma Gandhi

Book Review: Who Moved My Cheese - Spencer Johnson

Who Moved my Cheese, a novel by Spencer Johnson, was published in 1998. I first read this book back in 2002 or 2003. It was given to a group of us in the small office I worked in. I remember learning some absolutely life changing lessons on dealing with and accepting the inevitable change in our lives. It’s no secret that during that period of my life I did not like change, but this book opened my eyes to the wonderful things that were just waiting to occur in my life, simply by my learning to deal positively with change, no matter how unexpected.

The book tells the story of Scurry and Sniff, (the mice), and Hem and Haw (the two miniature humans), and their adventures as they wind through a maze of rooms, some filled with cheese and some that are not. The book encouraged me to look for new and better opportunities for improving the quality of my life, not just when times are hard or when things are uncomfortable, but to seek them daily.

Below are a few of my favorite quotes from the book.

**Having cheese makes you happy.

**The more important your cheese is to you,

        the more you want to hold on to it. 

**If you do not change, you can become

        extinct.  

**What would you do if you weren’t afraid?  
**Smell the cheese often so you know when it

         is getting old.  
**Movement in a new direction helps you find

        new cheese.  
**Imagining myself enjoying new cheese even

        before I find it, leads me to it.  
**The quicker you let go of old cheese, the

        sooner you find new cheese.  
**Old beliefs do not lead you to new cheese.  
**Noticing small changes early helps you 

       adapt to the bigger changes that are to

       come.

One of my favorite parts of the book is an illustration on page 74 titled, “The Handwriting on The Wall”. This is a summary of the lessons learned from the book. Below are a few of my favorite summary points listed as the "handwriting on the wall".

**Change Happens: They keep moving the
         cheese
**Anticipate Change: Get ready for the cheese 
         to move
**Monitor Change: Smell the cheese often so 
         you know when it is getting old
**Adapt to Change Quickly: The quicker you 
         let go of old cheese, the sooner you can 
         enjoy new cheese
**Change: Move with the cheese
**Enjoy Change: Savor the adventure and 
         enjoy the taste of new cheese
**Be ready to Change Quickly and Enjoy it 
        Again and Again: They keep moving the 
        cheese

Some criticism was given to managers and corporate executives who mass distributed the books to employees as a way to get the employees to agree with or get on board with changes at work, such as cutting hours or other things to the detriment of the employee, in an effort to get the employees to see the change as positive, and good for the whole team overall, even when it was not.

For me though, it was and will always be one of the best lessons I could have ever had in dealing with the changes in life, the inevitable changes, good or bad. The creative way in which the author chose to give this much needed advice to those who struggle with reacting negatively to change, made this an enjoyable and easy read.

Renewing The Spiritual Self

I blogged a couple of months ago about the importance of renewing the physical self and I listed several techniques one can use to assist with starting a healthy regimen for renewal. In addition to being physically fit one must also remain spiritually healthy as well. We have to renew our spiritual selves to maintain healthy and harmonic balance in our daily life.

There are just as many ways to renew your spiritual self and continue to maintain a healthy spirit as there are ways to maintain physical health. Popular renewal techniques for spiritual health include meditation and prayer, yoga and deep breathing exercises. Other options for renewing spiritual self are listening to music that soothes you or that gives you a good vibe (feeling), laughing out loud, doing something for others, and thinking positive thoughts and speaking positive affirmations, like quotes, throughout your day.

Daily meditation and prayer are popular and easy ways to relieve daily stress and maintain positive harmonic flows through your body. Meditation can be performed in various ways, and I encourage you to find time to meditate daily. It is most effective if done in quiet places, free from distractions. The website, Meditate in London http://www.meditateinlondon.org.uk/, has an informative article titled, “How to Meditate”, and there are several other helpful articles on this site related to meditation, which is a reliable spiritual health renewal technique.

Doing yoga and deep breathing exercises will increase your physical and mental health and thereby increasing overall spiritual health. Yoga and or deep breathing should be done in addition to your regular physical exercises. While yoga is best performed in comfortable clothing and a relaxing setting, breathing deeply can be done anytime and anyplace.

Take time each and every day to do something that satisfies your soul. Listen to your favorite playlist, or take time to unwind by reading a good book. Find humor in your daily life by looking at things from a different perspective. Don’t walk through the day being angry at yourself or others. This will only drain you and leave you feeling tired. Instead, use that precious energy to change that which is causing you to feel angry. Solve the problem, at the root, and don’t just continue to react to it with negative vibes. From positive thoughts come positive solutions.

Renewing your spiritual self will create positive energy for your mind to use to be more creative and to tap into your God-given talents and abilities and then you will find the tools necessary to use those talents and abilities to their fullest potential. When the light of your spirit is shining, nothing and no one can put that fire out. You and only you can continue to renew, continue to feed the fire, with new fuels, to keep that light shining so bright, that it becomes an eternal flame.

I cannot in this blog alone express the importance of renewing your spiritual self. It may be the single most critical action you can take toward being at peace inside and out.

Another Piece of Peace, Please

It is my belief that peace, true inner peace, cannot and should not be sought after or looked for, because it already exists in each and every one of us. The reason why some of us do not feel “at peace” is because we still have yet to accept and embrace the truth that each of us, as individuals, are ultimately responsible for our own sense of feeling "at peace". We are required to nurture, protect, and give peace the great care and consideration it deserves in our everyday life. This is necessary in order for the peace to sustain itself within us.

The first step to discovering your “Piece of Peace” is to start looking from within to uncover what your peace feels like. What brings you joy? What daily routines do you have that are in harmony with your mind and spirit? These are often keys that unlock our inner peace. Our perception of the daily events within our control, or even beyond it, has a great effect on the soul’s ability to experience peace. Start living your life in a manner that is consistent with the mind and body’s perception of peace.

Eating healthy foods intended for human consumption to avoid dis-ease and dis-comfort in the physical body and feed your mind daily with positive and encouraging thoughts. It is a fact that stress negatively impacts your physical health. When we are less stressed our breathing is more relaxed. Breathing is essential, so important that our bodies were perfectly designed to do it reflexively, without us even thinking about it. Research and implement daily routines for proper breathing techniques. This will aid the body with the flow of oxygen and will decrease stress.

Before we were ever physically born into this life, we experienced true inner peace in our mother’s womb. We were already equipped to experience a spiritual peace for eternity, but unfortunately, our brains have been trained and reconditioned to experience a life that is far from the way our souls in these physical bodies were designed to thrive. We have to retrain our brains and be in a harmonic synch with our physical bodies.

Also begin to unlearn the negative behaviors and habits we have accepted as the norm, for they are drawing us even farther from the divine understanding of self and how we interact with the community and the environment. We must remove from our lives the addictions and habits that are detrimental to our physical, mental, and spiritual well-being.

Listen and seek answers from within. You will find peace of mind, body, and spirit there.

A Piece of Peace: Homegrown Soul Food And Knowledge

I need to make some changes in my life. Instead of being angry because I am not the person I want to be, I am going to get busy being the person I know I was created to be. Part of that journey begins with changing the attitude I have toward life and people. I expect a lot from people, especially those around me, those closest to me. Sometimes I expect too much.

I can have my own little "Piece of Peace" right here, starting today. I have so much to be thankful for, and all the tools I need to make the visions in my head come true are within reach. I just need to get busy, and start making more time to do what I always wanted to do. Read, play in the dirt (gardening), write, and spend quality time with the ones I love. 

Life doesn't begin when things are right, it waits for nothing and no one. Live for today and be thankful for each day, as it is a blessing. Make the life you want to live tomorrow your action plan for the day. And always remember to be thankful for what you do have by first imagining what your life would be without it.

Never again will I confess my lack, for I have always had more than I needed, never again will I confess that I cannot, for I can do anything I focus my energies on, never again will I confess fear, for fear is simply in my own mind, waiting to destroy my hope, I will not profess weakness, for I am strong and my proof is my existence.

Take Time To Renew The Physical Self

Is the pressure of life getting you down and making you feel heavy? Are you tired and sluggish most of the time? Do you find that you have become stuck in a rut, so to say? Well, it may be due to a lack of your body feeling renewed, feeling recharged, and feeling refreshed; all necessary experiences for a healthy and physically fit human to continue to be physically fit, but often not our primary focus. We put so much pressure and strain on our physical bodies, always pushing physical abilities to the limits, and rarely taking the time to replenish that which we have drawn from so deeply and so often.

In the book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey discusses the overall importance of physical health and he stresses that rest, relaxation, and regular physical activity are all key actions one must take daily to maintain healthy balance and order with mental and physical health. Other key factors include stress management and nutrition.

You have to eat better and learn to live better in order to feel better.

Set a physically healthy schedule for yourself daily and stick to it. By doing things everyday at a certain time they soon become healthy habits. For example, take your vitamins everyday at the same time, schedule meals and snacks for certain times of the day, take time to exercise and meditate, daily, for at least 30-60 minutes for maximum effect. (Consult your physician before starting any exercise regimen if you are on medication, or under the direction of a medical professional for an existing condition. Exercise is important for everyone, period, but each person must take into account what are the healthy limits for their specific journey).

Wake up and go to bed on time, according to your schedule, avoid taking several naps throughout a 24 hour period, and make time to sleep at least 6-8 straight hours to allow your body time to recharge its battery.

Identify any factors in your life that may be the source of unnecessary stress. Manage those things in your life and never allow them to exhaust any more of your energy than they deserve. You and you alone can control your emotions and ultimately your mood. Your physical health is directly affected by your mental emotions and attitudes. Stress bring upon disease in the body and all the internal stress you hold in will find its way out, and can manifest as cancer, as lupus, as diabetes, and other illnesses.

Eating healthy is probably one of the most essential things one can do to improve and maintain a healthy physically fit body. Choose foods that are healthy for your brain and for your body. Foods that are fresh, and not cooked, eaten raw, like fruits and vegetables, are best for you. Eaten daily, with plenty of water will increase your energy and make you feel lighter. Eating healthy is also a sure fire way to maintain a healthy weight for your height and stature. Avoid fried foods and foods high in calories, preservatives, fats and sugar. None of these are good for you. Try to cut these from your daily diet and only indulge in moderation occasionally.

There is a combination of things one must do in order to maintain a healthy physically fit body. Each person must design a regimen and schedule that works best for them. Don't make the mistake of comparing yourself  to others, or use their failures and successes to define your own. Create a schedule that includes healthy diet choices, exercise, meditation, rest and relaxation, and above all, find the chance to live, laugh, and love your way to a better you.

My Dreams

Sometimes life get's in the way of our dreams, sometimes we allow others to stand in the way, and sometimes we are simply in our own way. Whatever the obstacle, we must find a way to overcome these distractions and take the time to pursue what is right for each of us, in our own lives. When you pursue your dreams you come closer to finding the peace and harmony in life that you internally and naturally crave.

I dream of days filled with learning, laughter, and love. Nights of explorations, and creation of dreams and goals. I long to be heard, understood, and I want to listen and understand. I want to live with someone in a harmony that is uplifting and one that provides the security of disagreements and resolutions, of compromise and sacrifice, out of love.

I want to own a home business of some sort, like collecting antiques, books, or maybe a small coffee shop, with books and music everywhere. I love history and want to travel to different countries. I want to experience life, one day at a time, and I want to share each new joy, each new pain, with someone who loves me. I want to be intellectual, I want to be silly, I want to dance, I want to sing, and I want to be appreciated. I want to serve others and enjoy finding new ways to be a creative spirit. I want to donate my time and use my talents to help others.

We could spend all day dreaming, and the truth of the matter is I may never get to all the things on my list. But it's important that each day I do something, even if its just to focus quietly and envision my dreams in my mind.

Life May Not Be The Party We Hoped For

One of my father's favorite people was his neighbor, who lives across the street, Mr. Cunningham. My father did numerous odd jobs for his friend, "Mr. C", and now that my father is no longer with us physically, my son has taken to helping out our neighbor.

Mr. Cunningham is now 90, and I can count on one hand the number of times I was in the presence of his wife Aileen, who passed late last year. She was a direct, firm, sincere, and loving spirit, I gathered all this in just those few occasions that we spent together.

Shortly after my father passed away, I received a gift from the Cunningham's, attached to the gift was a hand written note, on a small piece of stationary, and it simply read, 

"Life may not always be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance!" 

I saved that piece of paper, and every once in a while, I pull it out and look at it. I see her smiling as she writes the short note, words so few, with a meaning so big.

It's true, life isn't the party I always thought it would be. Life has been up and down, high and low, long and short, to and fro. Life has been joy and happiness, heartaches and pain; it's been sunshine and rainbows, after days of clouds and rain. Dance Anyway!

Life is what you make it, heaven and hell your experiences be, take the time to make the best of it, and fewer will your worries be. Appreciate the best things in life, take self inventory and you will see, the best things are all around you, and you were born to be free, so Dance Anyway!

In memory of our friend, Mrs. Alleen Cunningham, dancing with us in life!